Do you sense a weird vibe between your guy friend and you? Does it make you feel uncomfortable and unsure how to react when the two of you meet?
If this sounds familiar, then chances are you two might have crossed over the line from friends to something more.
It may be hard to admit, but establishing boundaries early on can save a friendship in a sticky situation. Confused about what’s deemed appropriate between platonic friends?
It can be awkward trying to figure out which behaviors should not go beyond ‘just friends.’ Being aware of these warning signs can prevent confusion for both parties involved.
The relationship between guys and girls does not have to stay static; there is no one cookie-cutter answer for why some friendships become strained.
Cognitive dissonance is the feeling of discomfort that arises when our beliefs and actions are inconsistent. In this situation, the belief is to maintain the friendship, but the fear of rejection makes it difficult to act on those feelings.
- One person might have feelings for the other
- The other person may not feel the same way
- Fear of ruining the friendship by rejecting the advances
- Cognitive dissonance is the explanation for the awkward feeling
To help avoid further awkwardness, I will highlight potential reasons why it has gotten so icy between your guy friend and yourself.
Why is it So Awkward With Your Guy Friend?
We’ve all been there: you’re chatting it up with your guy friend, everything is going great and suddenly the conversation comes to a screeching halt. What happened?? Why did things suddenly get so awkward? Let’s explore some of the potential reasons why this might happen.
1. Differing Perspectives
One person may view the relationship as being platonic, while the other may view it in a romantic light. This difference in perspective can lead to tension and confusion if neither party expresses their true feelings.
2. Fear of Rejection
Many people are wary about expressing their feelings for fear of potential rejection from the other party, resulting in an unspoken acknowledgment that things can remain “uncertain” without either having to take a concrete stance on it.
3. Desire to Preserve Friendship
Even though there may be underlying romantic feelings present, both parties might also value and appreciate their existing friendship too much to risk making things awkward by addressing any underlying attraction between them directly. This often results in awkwardness as both parties avoid any difficult conversations around these topics.
The other possible cause of discomfort between friends is misunderstandings. If something happened that caused your guy friend to think or feel a certain way about you, then he may be having trouble communicating his feelings honestly.
Misunderstandings can cause issues because it’s hard for him to express how he feels without feeling rejected. If this is the problem, try to talk it out and get on the same page.
Having meaningful conversations will help both of you resolve any misunderstandings and eliminate the awkwardness so you can have an honest, open relationship with one another again.
5. Cognitive dissonance
Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling that arises when we experience conflicting beliefs or emotions.
In the context of a guy friend and you, this may arise when one person has romantic feelings for the other, while the other does not feel the same way.
This often leads to an awkward situation where neither party knows how to address the issue head-on due to fear of ruining their existing friendship.
6. He might have feelings for you
It’s possible that the tension you feel between your guy friend and you stems from him having feelings for you, yet he is unsure as to how to handle them.
His hesitation may be causing him to avoid you instead of confronting these emotions squarely.
If this is the case, it is likely that he is scared of ruining your friendship and won’t eat if nothing changes.
Let him know that whatever this connection is between the two of you, friendship or something more, right now your relationship needs boundaries in order for it to continue in a good way.
7. Unspoken boundaries
One way to start setting boundaries is to have clear expectations on how each of you should greet and talk with one another like whether you give each other a hug hello or a simple handshake when meeting up.
By having these guidelines established, your conversations will become smoother, allowing both of you to feel more comfortable in the conversations and better understand each other.
Jealousy can also be a factor in why it is awkward between your guy friend and you. If one of you has feelings for the other, then it can be difficult to navigate these emotions without feeling jealous or insecure.
This can lead to tension and awkwardness as both parties try to figure out how to handle their feelings without hurting the other person. It is important to talk openly about any jealous feelings that may arise and to be honest with each other about what is going on.
By addressing the underlying issues, you can work together to make sure your friendship remains strong and comfortable for both of you. Whether it’s talking through misunderstandings, setting boundaries, or dealing with any romantic feelings, having an open dialogue is key to resolving any awkwardness between your guy friend and you.
Strategies for Overcoming Cognitive Dissonance
1. Talk About It Openly: Though it might be easier said than done, communication is key in cases like this – both parties need to clearly express how they feel about each other so that things don’t become more complicated down the line due to misunderstandings or misinterpretations of body language and tone of voice etc.
2. Hold Boundaries: If one person has conveyed romantic intentions towards another but this has not been reciprocated, then boundaries must be set and enforced so that no further incidents occur which could make things even more uncomfortable for everyone involved – especially if all parties want to maintain a healthy friendship dynamic with each other after this point!
3. Respect Each Other’s Feelings: Regardless of whether two people have different perspectives on their relationship status or not, respect needs to be given at all times as nobody should ever make someone else feel bad for expressing his/her true feelings about something that he/she holds dear!
If you suspect that your relationship with your guy friend is not what it used to be and things seem awkward between the two of you, it could be due to one or more of the reasons we discussed above.
Communication can help bridge the gap caused by unspoken expectations or issues caused by past experiences. So don’t hesitate to reach out and talk about it!