If you have ever felt that you are not good enough, or that no matter what you do, you will never be good enough, you are not alone. This is a common feeling that many people struggle with.
In today’s fast-paced world, where it seems like everyone’s success is on full display, it’s easy to feel like we’re not good enough.
Social media has only exacerbated this feeling, as we’re constantly bombarded with images and stories of other people’s achievements.
We often compare ourselves to others, whether it be in terms of their wealth, popularity, or success.
This leads us to set unrealistic goals and expectations for ourselves which can be damaging to our self-esteem. Instead of being kind and compassionate towards ourselves, we tend to be harsh and critical.
It’s important to remember that everyone’s path to success is different and that we should focus on our goals and progress rather than comparing ourselves to others.
As a learner and constant seeker of knowledge and growth, I can confidently say that I am not a guru in any sense of the word. However, I am dedicated to this path and would be honored to have you join me on this journey. Together, we can explore the vast world of learning and growth, always striving to become better versions of ourselves.
So, here are 7 Things To Keep In Mind When You Feel That You Aren’t Good Enough.
1. Silence Your Inner Critic.
When I feel like I’m not good enough it’s easy to let my inner critic take over.
But the truth is we all have that inner voice that tells us we’re not good enough, and it’s up to us to silence it.
Your inner critic is the voice inside your head that tells you that you’re not good enough, can’t do something, or are not worthy of love and happiness. This inner critic can be incredibly damaging, and learning how to quiet it down is essential.
One way to silence your inner critic is to reframe your thoughts. When you think negative thoughts, try to reframe them in a more positive light.
For example, instead of thinking, “I can’t do this,” try thinking, “I can do this, and I will learn and grow from the experience.” This simple change in perspective can significantly affect how you feel about yourself and your abilities.
I’ve found that the sooner I stop my inner critic, the easier it is to silence it.
AND REMEMBER, you are enough. Don’t let your inner critic hold you back from achieving your goals and living your best life.
Read next: 42 Positive Affirmations for Self-Discipline
2. Stop Comparing and Competing
Everyone is wired differently, and this is a good thing. But often we fall into the trap of trying to be like everyone else, which can lead to losing our unique qualities and individuality. This can be particularly damaging to our self-love and self-esteem.
In today’s world, it’s easy to constantly compare ourselves to others, especially with the proliferation of social media.
We see the seemingly perfect lives of others and feel like we don’t measure up. But it’s important to remember that these curated versions of reality don’t accurately reflect the complexities and struggles of everyday life.
Research has shown that excessive use of social media and comparing ourselves to others can negatively affect our self-esteem.
For example, one study found that participants who used Facebook frequently had lower self-esteem, partly because they were exposed to more upward social comparisons on social media. In other words, the more we compare ourselves to others the worse we tend to feel.
3. Limit Your Time On Social Media
I’ve noticed that spending a lot of time on social media can have a negative impact on my self-esteem.
It’s easy to fall into the comparison trap and start feeling like you’re not good enough. Even if you don’t want to, it’s hard to avoid the constant stream of negativity that can be found on social media.
People often use Facebook to complain and vent about their problems, and seeing so much negativity can have a negative impact on your subconscious mind.
It’s important to be aware of these negative effects and to take steps to limit your exposure to them.
4. Look Back To All The Times You Were Enough.
One way to break out of that mental prison and improve your self-confidence is to take some time to reflect on your past successes.
Sit down with a pen and a piece of paper and think about all the times in your life when you felt confident and accomplished something great. Write down a few specific memories that come to mind.
Whenever you’re feeling down and the thought of “I’m not good enough” creeps into your head, pull out that note and remember all the times when you felt unstoppable. This will help you change your perspective and remind you that you are capable of achieving great things.
By focusing on your past successes and accomplishments, you can overcome the negative thoughts that hold you back and build your confidence.
The only person who can truly hold you back is yourself. So don’t let your own doubts and fears limit your potential. Believe in yourself and your abilities, and you can achieve anything you set your mind to.
5. Open Up Your Emotions
When we have limiting beliefs popping up in our heads, it can be tempting to keep them to ourselves and try to push through the stress. However, this often only makes the situation worse.
Our bodies produce cortisol, the stress hormone, when we’re feeling overwhelmed, so it’s important to let it all out.
There are 2 ways to open up your emotions and release some of that built-up stress:
- Have a genuine conversation with a friend or loved one.
Talk about the thoughts you’re having and let them add their opinion. Oftentimes, all we need is someone to listen and provide a different perspective to help us see our situation in a new light.
- Journal about it.
If you don’t have someone close by or you don’t want to talk about it with another person, journaling is a great way to let all of your feelings and thoughts out on paper. This can help you gain some clarity and work on improving the things that are bothering you.
Either way, it’s important to release those emotions and stress in a healthy way.
6. Don’t Beat Yourself Up.
First of all, let me just say that I totally get where you’re coming from. For a big part of my life, I also used to beat myself up for past mistakes and for not being “good enough.”
I would tell myself all sorts of negative things in order to “motivate” myself to do better or to try harder. And even today, I sometimes catch myself doing the same thing.
But here’s the thing: beating yourself up doesn’t actually do you any good. In fact, it’s more likely to do more harm than good.
The past is what it is, and there’s nothing you can do to change it. Sure, you can learn from your mistakes and do better in the future, but dwelling on the past and beating yourself up isn’t going to help you achieve that.
So, instead of beating yourself up, why not try to focus on changing your today? After all, the only thing you can actually control is the present moment. And by making positive changes in your life today, you can create a better future for yourself.
Additionally, there are many other ways to motivate yourself to do things, and beating yourself up isn’t one of them.
You don’t need to speak to yourself in a negative way or put yourself down in order to get things done. In fact, I encourage you to speak to yourself in the same way you would speak to a child or your best friend.
Think about it: would you ever tell a child or your best friend that they’re a failure or that they’re worthless and unlovable? Of course not! So why would you speak to yourself in that way?
Telling yourself negative things isn’t going to make you any more successful or make you feel any more worthy or lovable. In fact, it’s likely to have the opposite effect.
So, I urge you to stop beating yourself up and to start speaking to yourself in a kind and compassionate way.
You deserve it.
7. You Deserve To Feel Loved & Cared For.
Next time you find yourself struggling with self-doubt and the feeling of not being good enough, remember that it’s completely normal to feel this way.
It’s important to recognize that it’s okay to reach out to others for help and support. In fact, it’s crucial to your well-being.
When we’re feeling overwhelmed by negative emotions, it can be challenging to open ourselves up to love and understanding from others. But it’s important to remember that we need this love and support even more during these difficult times.
So, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Your friends and loved ones want to be there for you and offer their support. It’s okay to lean on them and let them help you through tough times.
Remember, you are not alone. There are people who care about you and want to help you through your struggles.
Don’t let self-doubt and negative emotions hold you back from accepting the love and support that you deserve.
The 4-Step Process To Become More Confident.
Step 1: Take the first step.
Even if you don’t feel ready, just start. Begin working towards your goals and don’t let your lack of confidence hold you back.
Remember, confidence is something that is built over time, and you can’t expect to feel confident right away. So, start taking small steps and don’t be afraid to make mistakes.
Check our article on What is Self-Improvement? And Why You Need It.
Step 2: Focus on getting results.
Once you start taking action, focus on getting results. When you achieve your goals, you’ll start to see that you’re capable of more than you thought.
This will help you build your confidence and feel more self-assured. So, keep working towards your goals and celebrate your successes.
Step 3: Build your confidence.
As you start getting results, your confidence will naturally grow. Each time you achieve something, your comfort zone expands, and with it, your confidence.
So don’t be afraid to try new things and push yourself out of your comfort zone. The more you do, the more confident you’ll become.
Step 4: Stack up that confidence.
The final step is to keep stacking up that confidence. As you continue to take action and achieve your goals, your confidence will continue to grow.
Keep working on building your confidence and soon you’ll be feeling more self-assured and capable than ever before.
it’s important to remember that everyone goes through periods where they don’t feel good enough. It’s natural to have these feelings, but it’s important to remind ourselves that we are valuable and deserving of love and happiness.
It can be helpful to remind ourselves of our accomplishments and strengths, and to reach out to friends and loved ones for support. Above all, it’s important to be kind to ourselves and to practice self-care during these times. Remember, you are not alone and you are enough just the way you are.